Holiday Blues

Sometimes i just miss him. The way he said my name and stroked my messy hair. it may seem like I should be over him by now, but the pure innoscence of his love is missing from my world, and I dont know if i can handle not seeing his face everyday. Some people say they can just keep moving on, even if they know they just lost the only one their heart can love so deeply. Me on the other hand, im not so sure. Christmas is nearing, our favorite holiday, and I am feeling the loneliness in my stomach. Kind of like a fish out of water, i am not sure how to get through the season without him. We were supposed to be planning a wedding together. Planning the rest of our lives together. But now all I can plan is what i am going to eat for dinner. I feel a bit lost, i must say, and not sure how this winter is going to span out. But I do know this-it will be rather hard not to think about him. I love him and always will.